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Daily Painting Musings

Daily Painting – Living Waters

I’ve been reading this book called Daily Painting by Carol Marine. The main message is to encourage artists to paint daily for their art to improve. I’ve only read a few pages but I am all in with the idea.

For my first painting, I painted a stream that flows into a river. As most of my paintings/ artworks/ writings reflect my inner thoughts, I wanted to share why I chose to paint this piece.

The past weeks have not been the best of times for me and Howell. I’ve been thinking a lot about life in general. One thing that keeps coming to mind is how I want to live my life. What do I want it to look like?

One gets a good perspective of how insignificant our issues can be if we look at the long-term consequences of the things we do on an everyday basis. It gives perspective on the things we consider “huge” and on the things we consider “petty/ trivial”. As Howell and I are at an age where we have all the resources we need at our disposal, it would be such a waste to live life as if it were just ours alone to live.

What are the good things we have for, if we choose to keep it to ourselves?

I thought of an imagery of a stream. The stream trickles down water from various sources and flows it to rivers. I want my life to be life-giving, not because I produce life on my own but that because I am connected to a source that never dries up. I want my words, my actions, my decisions, to reflect the purest of waters my source gives.

If there was just one thing that I want people to remember me by, it would be how gracious I have been, in whatever situation I were in. I want to be proud not of my achievements or my stature, or of my possessions I have acquired in my lifetime.

Instead, I want to be proud of the times I chose to forgive in spite of the pain. I want to be proud of giving even when I feel like there is no more left to give. I want to be proud of the fact that I have tried to reach out to those who are in pain, alone, and helpless. I want to be proud of living a life where I was able to give my all, especially to those who need it. I want to live a life that seeks to give, expecting nothing in return.

I hope my daily words, thoughts, and actions will help me achieve that – to be a life-giving stream, no matter the situation.

 

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Uncategorized

Praising God in Season and Out of Season

I am a black or white type of person. Navigating grays is a huge weakness of mine. This behaviour translates not only to my judgement of things but with other areas of my life, too – frustratingly, this includes my emotions.

Things that matter so much to me affects me in ways I can not even explain. Simple events or items that I can not take off my list weigh a heavy burden on my shoulders.

I hate to admit it, but I still am in love with control.

It drives me mad when things do not go as planned, most especially, when I meticulously plan for it –  which, to be fair, is a rare occasion. I tend to be spontaneous because I hate being disappointed. If something is not planned, then I can accept the chaos of it all. But if I have spent a huge chunk of my time on something and it goes haywire, expect dark days. It’s just me.

I came across that crossroad just a few days ago. Do the things that I do still matter? Are these things still of value? Why am I spending so much time on something I may not see the fruits of? It has been utterly frustrating. I pace back and forth and check where I took the wrong turn, an exercise that has always proven itself futile.

In the midst of the chaos, I am reminded of the fact that the God I love and serve does not change. The way I treat Him, the way I love Him, the way I worship Him, should not change because He never does. I am reminded that on those sunny and warm seasons, I can always turn to Him and thank Him for all the wonderful things He brings my way. In the cold and dark seasons, I can always still draw close to Him to seek for comfort.

Ultimately, it’s not about how I feel at any given time. My commitment is not to love the Lord only in the wonderful, blessing-filled days. My commitment is to love the Lord with all my heart and with all my soul and with all my mind because really, being faithful to Him is not just for Him alone. I believe that God calls us to abide in Him and to cling to Him in the good and the bad so He can provide for us the grace and mercies sufficient for the day.

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Musings

The Case of the Average

I was listening to a talk during the weekend when it was mentioned that one should do something (I cannot remember which part of the talk this is) for him/ her to reach his/her best self. The reason I did not remember what that something was because my mind got stuck with the idea of developing into our best selves.

I had this seemingly dumb question looming over my head – one can never go wrong with trying to achieve the best, but why? Why do I need to develop into my best version? Is not my current version enough?

I am happy. I am contented. I seem to have everything I need. Why do I need to go beyond the good and the better version of me?

Is good enough not good enough? And like the detail maniac that I am, I racked my brain with reasons why:

  1. Because why settle?
  2. Because I hate wastage. I am already putting in time, effort, and resources. Why waste the effort by only giving it your good?
  3. Because good is only a step away from bad, actually
  4. Because honestly, I’d rather die trying than die with my what-ifs

I’ve learned that really, there’s nothing wrong with the average, but there is nothing exceptional about it, though. Why do we tend to choose the average, then?

  1. It’s easy.
  2. Giving it your best can be tiring. But would giving it your good enough make it less tiring?
  3. We sometimes feel like we have no choice. We do not have enough to go beyond the good enough. We choose what is presented to us, thinking that there is nothing beyond the box we confine ourselves into.
  4. I can just be plain lazy.

They say you need to start with the end in mind. And if I do think of the end, I think of the absolute end of my existence. When I die, whether I die at 30, or whether I reach 90, there is a longer time I want to secure – eternity.

If doing my best and reaching my best self is one way of securing my eternity in heaven, would I then not risk it all? Yes, average is good; but eternity does not recognize the average. The choice is yours.

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Musings Settling in NZ Uncategorized

Welcome 2019!

2019 New year greeting card with fireworks. Minimalist style, geometric thin outline. Vector, eps.10

“…yet in the midst of the chaos, God said, ‘Be still and know that I am God.’ Indeed, He is.

Even if I don’t feel it, even if I don’t see it.

I have cried over this several times, asking God to take this cup away from me. I went here with a leap of faith, never fully understanding that it can take a longer time before I fully land my feet on flat ground.

Be still. God will move. God has moved. He paved the way ahead of me, even if I haven’t seen it yet.

I am terribly bad at waiting but this time, I have to be perfectly still and wait for my Saviour who has the best intents for me. I will not whine nor grumble.

I will be still, just as He commanded me.”

This was one of my reflections 2 years ago. We were 2 months in New Zealand and it was a time of complete uncertainty for Howell and I. We just arrived, jobless, and were not even sure of my visa so I can stay in the country.

A month after, Howell got his job, and we moved into our home where we still reside today.

Time flies. It is now 2019.

That was a tough year for us and 2018 was a bittersweet one. Howell was promoted twice, moved into another wonderful company. We found new friends and lost old ones.

I got into a major vehicular accident, had bouts of depression because of the accident, dealt with major health issues because I was in pain for 3 straight months after the accident. After which, it led me to go back to my first love – writing and arts. It was also the year I launched my online shop.

I began to accept that our decision to go here would mean I will be apart from the people I loved the most. We’ve traveled parts of New Zealand and visited the Philippines. We’ve made huge milestones in 2018 and we lost huge parts of our hearts too – some, we know, left a permanent void in our lives.

In all things that happened, God has been faithful. Every pain has its own joys and triumphs.  Every setback has presented us with greater opportunities. Every void was a chance to fill our lives with wonderful surprises.

I know 2019 will present more to me and Howell. May it be good or bad, I know that the Lord will continue to be faithful.

For I know well the plans I have in mind for you, says the LORD, plans for your welfare, not for woe! plans to give you a future full of hope. – Jeremiah 29:11

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The Long Drive Chronicles Uncategorized

I Am Okay

After a 2-month hiatus from blogging, I am here to tell everyone that I am okay. I was planning to write something about my recent awesome holiday but things happen and writing is the only way I know for me to sort out what happened.

I was on my way to work this morning when I got hit by another car. The next thing I knew, I was holding the wheels sideways, looking for an exit for me to get out of the car. How many times did it flip? I wouldn’t know. I saw the car from the corner but I honestly do not know why the driver decided to go straight ahead.

The first thing I thought was how I was going to go to work and if what happened was real. I was just cruising on the road. I did nothing unusual as I was below the speed limit of that road. The car that hit me came from a corner and I was pretty confident to go straight because it was supposed to stop because that road has a give way sign.

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I think 3 to 4 onlookers came to my rescue as soon as they saw me. They checked up on me if I had any injuries, which at that time, I didn’t know I had so I said I was okay. One of them called in the accident immediately and so 3 police cars arrived a few minutes after the accident. The police got my details and my statement. They sorted everything out as I stayed in one of the police cars.

I called one of my workmates to let her know what happened so she can relay the information as well. And as she just lives around the area where I met the accident, she dropped by to check in on me. My father-in-law came to pick me up and I am here, now, 3 hours after, retelling my story in my blog.

Papa told me that we can learn from these incidents. Praise God that I survived, unscathed. Well, except for a scratch on my left leg and perhaps a bruise on my right leg. I will go and have myself checked once Howell arrives home.

In all these, I just want to get the message across. In terms of practicalities, here are some of the things that people have to consider, especially if they are driving.

  • Nissan Liberty is a safe car. No kidding. I would have died given the damage to the car.
  • Put on your seatbelt. That saved me.
  • Get insurance. It takes your mind off of the financial side of things. I was driving carefully but someone hit me. I couldn’t have predicted that. You may be taking care of yourself but someone might recklessly just crash into you like what happened to me.
  • Contigo water bottles are pretty sturdy hahaha. All the containers where my lunch was packed were broken but my Contigo water bottles? Yeah, nah. Still good.
  • Sort your personal items well so that in emergency cases, they may find the contact details of the people who need to know of your status. Good thing for me, my phone is intact in spite of the crash so I was able to coordinate with people well. Had it broke, I did not even have Howell’s number memorized.

Now that all those practical items are mentioned, I know I have to share the biggest factor why I still am alive at this very moment.

The police officer who came to my assistance asked me if I go to church and I said I did. She surprisingly told me that my faith saved me. And I wholeheartedly believe so. I was moved to worship and to pray even as I was driving at the motorway this morning, a few kilometres from where the accident happened. And I did. I worshipped the Lord for He is glorious, He is all-powerful, He is a God who can bring things into action, wherever you are, whatever circumstances you might be in.

With the damage to my car and with how events happened, I may already be at my Daddy’s side right now. But it wasn’t God’s will yet. I lived to testify to something greater than myself. I am given, literally, a second chance at life. I am moved to tears as I type these words because things would have turned the other way. The Lord saved me and He saved me for a reason. What for? I am bound to find out. Right now, I will just praise and thank Him for the life He has gifted me with.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Musings Uncategorized

The Myth that is Preparedness

A few days ago, I saw a video on Facebook which talks about time and how not to waste it, basically. I find these videos a cliche sometimes but then this one made sense. It kind of made me look at some areas of my life that I have not been dealing with. Below is a copy of the video if you want to see it for yourself.

I took several steps to fix my schedule and put a structure to it, somehow, but that is altogether a separate topic.

What I’m driving at is that after I took a good look at my schedule and how I am using my time, I saw that I have been spending it on the things that I love doing, which is not necessarily a bad thing, but I haven’t focused on doing the things I need to do to achieve what I want. For most people, doing things that they love and doing things to achieve something they want is almost the same thing, but for me, it isn’t.

To contextualize this confusing concept, when I refer to the things that I love, these are my hobbies–swimming, painting, reading, etc. The things that I want to achieve or want to have are: several businesses, good health (yes, it’s something I am working to achieve now!), eetc.

I saw that I have been postponing the concrete things I should do for me to achieve my goals (one specific goal that I am referring to is a business venture that I have been planning for 2 straight years now) because I want things to be perfect. I want to be fully ready before I do anything for fear that I may fail if I were not perfect or ready enough. Two straight years was not long enough for me to be ready, according to my irrational fears.

It was until Howell offered to do ALL the chores at home for this month just for me to have “time” to focus on this business, which was pretty ironic because he works Mondays till Fridays while I work Wednesdays till Fridays. I guess he knows me too much to know that if he gives me all the time in the world, I might eventually get tired of focusing solely on my hobbies. That’s kind of what happened.

So this week, I finally decided to take that step. A few months back, I already secured my supplier for the items I wanted to sell in my shop. I’ve also been paying for a website of my own for 4 months but because of my fear that I wasn’t ready enough, I totally abandoned doing anything to actually push through with my lofty business idea. Due to my indecision, the supplier I secured ditched me already so I had to frantically search for another supplier who should be reliable enough not to leave me. Thank God, I did found one a day after I found out about the other supplier.

When you look closely at your fears, you’ll often see that fears are just a manifestation of something deeper. For me, I do leave things hanging for fear of not finding a next purposeful goal after I have achieved it. Sometimes, I am too fearful that achieving this specific goal may tie me to a spot where I cannot leave. At times, I fear that I am missing out on something better that may still be out there and so I hold off moving as long as I can. Until I’m ready. Until every area of my circumstances are perfect.

Now, I am totally devoted to this cause, in spite of the fear. Why? Because if I wouldn’t take the first step, nothing will actually happen. What changed? The idea that no matter how wonderful and perfect my ideas are, if I do not do anything to achieve it, it will remain as, well, ideas, however perfect they may be. Ideas are good but without action, they serve no purpose.

At the end of my life, how would I account for how I lived? Like every gift given to me, I’d like to use it to the fullest and make something beautiful, something bigger than myself, out of the little or much that I have been given. There is no better time to move but today, now, at this very moment. Being prepared is good, but being fully prepared is a myth. If it makes sense and if it is something that the Lord wants me to pursue, then I’ll take a leap of faith, hoping against hope that what little I have may bear fruit and bless others.

Featured photo from http://passionforfreshideas.com/personalgrowth/leap-of-faith-jessica-mcgregor-johnson/

 

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Uncategorized Work

Mums Go Free at Staglands on Mother’s Day Weekend!

Mums Go Free at Staglands on Mothers Day Weekend

Saturday 12th to Sunday13th May      

 

At Staglands we all know how important mums are so are offering each and every one of them free entry into The Reserve on Mothers Day weekend, 12th to 13th May! That’s not just one day but the whole weekend!

Mothers must be accompanied by their children aged 16 years or under to enjoy this special treat.  So why not make a day of it and bring up a family picnic or if you prefer put your feet up and relax by the log fire in our cosy cafe.

Grab your free entry vouchers at www.staglands.co.nz today!

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The Long Drive Chronicles Uncategorized

The Other Side

We have received terrible news in the past week, the passing of two sisters in our prayer groups in the Philippines and here in New Zealand. I was surprised with how devastating it felt. I honestly am not too close with both of them but I knew them enough.

I knew of Giki’s passing through a common friend. I really thought, or maybe I kind of hoped, that it was only a joke. She died of childbirth complications. Fortunately, their baby is alive and well. She’s almost my age and her husband’s a good friend of mine. I knew how long he waited for her and how happy he was when they finally got married.

I wasn’t too affected at first but it hit me the second day I’ve received the news. I was crying my heart out the whole day. The people at work might have found it odd that my eyes are red and swollen the whole day but I didn’t really have the courage to tell them about it. Even if I felt like telling them what happened, nothing would make a difference because I was miles away from home. I couldn’t be there for my friend.

The next news was of Rose’s passing. We knew her for just a year. I think the first conversation I had with her was before one of our meetings and no one was in the venue yet so she invited me to wait with her in her car. She shared how it was for her when she migrated to New Zealand.

I remember this was the time I was really anxious if I’d ever have a decent job here. We both were HR professionals back in the Philippines so we had something that we can talk about. She shifted to a career in finance here, I think. She talked about how she herself experienced how difficult it was to find a job here. Our conversation for the most part was uneventful but she made an impact to me that day. She assured me that all will be well and that I had to trust that God will provide for me and my family. She didn’t know how thankful I was of that assurance. I needed that badly at that time.

I tend to be pretty dense during these situations. I try to avoid my emotions and deny them most of the time but the Lord confronted me through them. I see death as something beautiful and freeing. I have learned this when my dad passed away. I had to hope that it is indeed beautiful, that death does not simply end in death alone, but it is a meaningful reunion with our Maker and that someday, we’ll join them.

Like I said, the second day after the news of their passing was different for me. For some reason, I could not fight back the tears that day. My drive going home is an hour so I have a lot of “silent moments” that I tend to think about things.  While I was driving home that day, I heard this song entitled The Other Side. Here is an excerpt of the lyrics that really stuck with me:

I bet you feel you’re finally home
Running down those streets of gold
The kind of peace you can’t explain
Looking into Jesus’ face

I know that you’re in a better place
I know I’ll be joining you someday

It isn’t easy to say goodbye
But I know it’s only for a little while
Run up ahead and I will catch up
‘Cause I’m gonna see you when tomorrow comes
On the other side

Where there are no more goodbyes
No more pain, no more tears left to cry
We will join with the angels singing their song
Praising our savior, all the day long

It isn’t easy to say goodbye
But I know it’s only for a little while
Run up ahead and I will catch up
‘Cause I’m gonna see you when tomorrow comes
On the other side

There are times when the Lord speaks to me through songs and I felt like He was dealing with me through this song. It didn’t deny the pain of death but it sheds a ray of hope that someday, we will meet again. This time, there’ll be no goodbyes. It gives hope that yes, those who have gone ahead of us are free. They are joyfully looking into Jesus’ face. In the meantime, I can continue my journey here so that someday, we may all meet again…

So to you, sisters, Giki and Rose, bask in God’s embrace. You had been His faithful servants. We will all be looking forward to seeing you someday, until we meet again.

Watercolor background Designed by Freepik

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Settling in NZ Uncategorized

NZ Visa Experience

One of the issues immigrants face is applying for visas to work and stay in another country. In the years past, it was not too difficult for migrants to get a visa to stay permanently here in New Zealand. Unfortunately, we came at a time when a lot of the processes and requirements have changed. As for me, here is my experience of the whole process. Bear in mind that this is not a comprehensive one since everything is already a blurry for me.

What visa do I apply for?

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The visas I applied for in a nutshell.

I came to New Zealand through a Visitor’s Visa that will last for 59 days. We opted for this one because it was free. We knew that once I get here, I will apply for another visa, thus we chose not to have any additional spend for this. Note that Howell is already a Permanent Resident visa holder since 2011 so we did not have to worry about his visa here.

When we were already here, we did not know what options we had for my visa so we consulted Immigration NZ. They have confirmed that with our specific case, given that we were already living together for more than 12 months during the time of application, we can opt to apply straight to residency (which can take up to 9 months at the time we called) or if we wish to have a visa that would allow me to work soon, then we can choose the work visa (with processing time of 25 days max) instead. Given that there were more opportunities for me at that time, we decided to apply for the work visa since its processing time is shorter.

After I got a job, we pushed for the application of my residency visa. We needed to save up for another application (because fee$$$ haha) so we postponed it until I had my own job.

Timelines

My visitor’s visa was approved in 10 days if I can remember it right. Processing time was shorter perhaps because it was my second visit already.

My work visa was approved 4 months after I submitted my application, in contrary to the 25 days stated in their website then. This was the toughest visa I had to apply for because I had issues with my urine test. I had to retake because they found traces of sugar in my urine sample (which was not normal). It went downhill from there. For some reason, it was difficult for them then to confirm what stage my application was but it was approved nevertheless.

My resident visa was approved 5 months after my application. Should we have known that the timelines for the work and resident visa would be the same, we would have opted to apply straight to resident visa since we spent a significant amount for both applications.

Requirements

All requirements can be found on Immigration NZ’s website. Their list of requirements are pretty comprehensive and straightforward so there is no guesswork, especially for the visitor’s visa.

The requirements for my work and resident visa are almost the same, except we added a few items like the tenancy agreement and home bills to the resident visa application since we were already renting on our own then. Since my application is partnership-based, we had to provide documents that will prove that we are in a genuine and stable relationship for more than 12 months. A marriage certificate here is a recognized proof of a relationship but is not enough to prove a genuine and stable one so we had to add on several items to the application. Below is a list of all the requirements  I can remember:

  • Marriage certificate
  • Tenancy agreement
  • Statement of joint bank account
  • Statement of joint investments
  • Copious amount of photos, especially the ones we’ve posted on social media
  • Letters from family members posted to our home
  • Utility billings
  • Timeline of the relationship (a friend told me a bullet-type of timeline is acceptable but since I am extra, I did a 3-page narration of our love story;) )
  • Tickets and bookings from all our travels throughout the years
  • Some people submit references (statements from people in NZ who know them and can testify about the status of their relationship) but we chose not to because we are both not comfortable asking people for this

Extra items to take note of

  • Personally, keeping in touch with Immigration is helpful throughout the process of applying. I usually call them at least twice a month just to check on the status of my application. When my case officer emailed me, I emailed her twice. There is a thin line between asking and being pushy in terms of asking for updates so you’d have to strike a balance on this.
  • Be as organized as possible because you may need your documents in another application. We have all our documents filed in one binder so it is easy to produce them when it is needed.

What now?

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My Resident Visa

For those who wanted to know what my current visa is, it will allow me to stay in New Zealand indefinitely. However, should I choose to travel outside of New Zealand after 19th March 2020, I will need to apply for another resident visa to re-enter the country.

I can also apply for a permanent resident visa after 2 years. So if we will be travelling outside New Zealand after 19th March 2020, we might need to apply for permanent resident visa. In 5 years, I will be eligible to apply for citizenship.

As an NZ Resident, I am also eligible to receive all the benefits a citizen or permanent resident has, e.g. health care, KiwiSaver, maternity leave, etc.

Other options

For those wanting to apply for a visa here, visit https://www.immigration.govt.nz/new-zealand-visas for more details. The information in their website is really helpful. You can also choose to ring them for specific questions. Here is a quick information on how to contact them.

Hope this was helpful!

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Musings Uncategorized

Entrusting the Fine Details

As I shared in my last blog post, Howell and I are doing leaps here. There are heaps of blessings and fulfilled promises coming our way. One of our recent leaps is a life-changing deal we made with another person. I cannot begin to describe the scale of it. Just a disclaimer, this is not a shady business deal and it is totally legal.

One description I can give is that this deal will accelerate our plans. The time it will take to achieve the things we hoped for will significantly be reduced. It sounded too good to be true but it’s no easy task and so we knew that we needed to work really hard for it. And with all high-return decisions, come high risks.

We knew that we will be trying to achieve lofty goals and we knew the type of effort and the risks needed for these to come into fruition. However, we are secure that these risks we are taking are well worth it basically because we know the person we are dealing with. This person is trustworthy and committed. We knew that he knows the highs and lows of what we are trying to do. Some of the details, we will build as we go along but we know that he is capable and together, these goals are achievable.

I was awed by the kind of trust we gave to this person. In the same way, I have come to realize that if we know that the one we are dealing with is trustworthy, we can trust fully without any hesitations. If we both can trust this human being, why can’t I entrust the entirety of my life to an all-knowing, all-powerful, ever-present God? It is, admittedly, a weakness of mine. I am a worrier, a control-freak. I like planning things to the detail. With this concrete experience of saying yes to someone we deem trustworthy, I know that we both will learn. We know that if we get to know more of this God like we knew this person we were dealing with, there will be no reason for anxiety. We can entrust our lives fully, we can entrust even the finer details of our lives.

Proverbs 3:1-6

Do not forget my teaching, but let your heart keep my commandments. For length of days and years of life and peace they will add to you. Do not let kindness and truth leave you.
Bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. So you will find favor and good repute in the sight of God and man. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.