“…yet in the midst of the chaos, God said, ‘Be still and know that I am God.’ Indeed, He is.
Even if I don’t feel it, even if I don’t see it.
I have cried over this several times, asking God to take this cup away from me. I went here with a leap of faith, never fully understanding that it can take a longer time before I fully land my feet on flat ground.
Be still. God will move. God has moved. He paved the way ahead of me, even if I haven’t seen it yet.
I am terribly bad at waiting but this time, I have to be perfectly still and wait for my Saviour who has the best intents for me. I will not whine nor grumble.
I will be still, just as He commanded me.”
This was one of my reflections 2 years ago. We were 2 months in New Zealand and it was a time of complete uncertainty for Howell and I. We just arrived, jobless, and were not even sure of my visa so I can stay in the country.
A month after, Howell got his job, and we moved into our home where we still reside today.
Time flies. It is now 2019.
That was a tough year for us and 2018 was a bittersweet one. Howell was promoted twice, moved into another wonderful company. We found new friends and lost old ones.
I got into a major vehicular accident, had bouts of depression because of the accident, dealt with major health issues because I was in pain for 3 straight months after the accident. After which, it led me to go back to my first love – writing and arts. It was also the year I launched my online shop.
I began to accept that our decision to go here would mean I will be apart from the people I loved the most. We’ve traveled parts of New Zealand and visited the Philippines. We’ve made huge milestones in 2018 and we lost huge parts of our hearts too – some, we know, left a permanent void in our lives.
In all things that happened, God has been faithful. Every pain has its own joys and triumphs. Every setback has presented us with greater opportunities. Every void was a chance to fill our lives with wonderful surprises.
I know 2019 will present more to me and Howell. May it be good or bad, I know that the Lord will continue to be faithful.
For I know well the plans I have in mind for you, says the LORD, plans for your welfare, not for woe! plans to give you a future full of hope. – Jeremiah 29:11
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